D*ck Rating

I specialize in Humiliation and Degradation, but I'm also more than capable of crafting you an honest rating or perhaps you'd like praise?

My overall style has been noted as coming across a bit satirical, but I mean every word I write.

Looking for something unique and different? Check out my special listings for d*ck poems, haikus, naming your d*ck, and more.

Delivery for d*ck rates may take up to 4 business days. A lot of thought is put into them. While a quick turn around is nice for some, consider this... I will be thinking about your d*ck that entire time. And there is something is to be said for Antici.....






....pation.

Your rating will be sent as a commemorative printable PDF, as well as text in an email. Print and proudly display your rating for all to see.

The rules for a "cla**ic" rating:
- You may send up to 5 photos of your d*ck
- I will craft a thoughtful rating of at least 2 paragraphs on several parameters depending on the style of rating you choose.
- 🌈LGBTQIA+ FRIENDLY🌈 Please lmk you/your d*ck's preferred pronouns.
If pronouns are unlisted I will a**ume He/Him/His.
- This is about your genitalia, not mine. I may or may not include descriptions of what a hypothetical partner may or may not experience with your d*ck, but it will be based mostly on you.

You may choose:
- Honest: A compliment sandwich. Choose how you want it to end (high note/low note)

- Humiliation: A brutal and verbose rating. Please communicate boundaries after purchase.

- Praise: Read this and walk away feeling like a first-rate c*cksman.

After you receive your rating please know that we're done with the transaction. I do not offer JOI, S*xting, Etc. I do not want to be messaged unless it's for a further paid service.

50.00 USD 500

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Erotic Poetry Erotica D*ck Naming D*ck Rating D*ck Praise Sph Humiliation Praise Unique D*ck Penis Rating Penis Honest Honest Rating Rating Name Naming