My Story: Sexual Abuse, Marriage, Motherhood, and My ATW Journey

Seller Sellers’ Perspective

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I’ve recently celebrated my 4-month anniversary here on ATW and I wanted to take some time to write and share my experiences here thus far. I’ve been absolutely blown away by this incredible community of kinky freaks that we are, and the support provided to each other. What I have gotten in these four months is so much more than I ever could have imagined, and it will all stay with me for life. Here’s a little back story about me.

Growing up

I was brought up in a Christian home and actually still attend church and hold my beliefs close to my heart. But that doesn’t mean I’m not here for a naughty good time because that is EXACTLY why I’m here! As I got older, things only intensified for me and my desire to masturbate just became stronger and more frequent as the hormones raged in my body. It of course became easier to hide and I found new ways to get off. In the shower with the massage wand or my hairbrush handle were my favorites because there was absolutely no way I’d get caught or interrupted. During this time, thanks to the wonders of technology and buying myself a computer that was in my room, I discovered porn and erotic stories and became addicted.

Dark times

In my late teens and early 20’s, I was going through some hard stuff. My dad left our family, my brother was out of control, I became my mom’s support, I was so depressed and (my then undiagnosed) anxiety was so incredibly bad. I had zero self-confidence, very little self-worth and no self-esteem. I felt judged by everyone and even felt like in a room full of hundreds of people that everyone was staring at me and just picking me apart. I felt so fat as a size 12 and felt so out of place in a world that continually shoved skinny fake bodies down everyone’s throat. I was so lost and alone and no one even knew. I became even more addicted to porn and even watched it at work on numerous occasions on my work computer. Sitting there at my desk fingering myself.

Brighter days

Then a new pastor came into my life and through his counsel, things started to improve for me. I worked through the hurt of what my dad did and truly began to find my self-confidence and self-worth. I put aside the porn and masturbation for the most part and tried my best to live my life as a good Christian girl.

After two short-lived and failed relationships, I met my now husband. We’ve been together for 16 years now and married 14 of those. He and our two kids are my biggest blessings. We have an incredible marriage and make each other so very happy. But things were lacking in the bedroom for me. My years of porn, erotic stories and masturbation had me longing for more. But I didn’t know how to fully communicate that with him for years. I was a virgin when we married, he’d had sex one time. To say we were inexperienced and naive is an understatement. When you grow up within the church, you are given NOTHING in preparation for sex. Just set up with birth control. You literally walk in clueless unless you yourself have read and learned on your own as best you can while single. Our honeymoon was great and so was sex after we returned home…. for a time. But then life happened, we settled into our routines and sex became less frequent as the months passed.

Sex life as a mom

Then bring on the kids. What a fucking wrecking ball. Constantly exhausted from nursing and diaper changes 24/7, sex was the farthest thing from my mind. After our second child was born, my hormones were so out of whack. I had absolutely NO desire for sex. On the rare occasions I would feel horny, my husband would of course be at work. So back to porn and masturbation I went. I was ashamed and hid it from him. Eventually, I came to realize that most of the reason I had no sex drive was because I wasn’t being fully satisfied, not by myself or with him. He was, but not me and as a result, I didn’t want it and I didn’t care if he was getting pleased or not because I wasn’t. We tried talking about things and they got a little better. I made sure he understood how important foreplay was and how I needed to feel I was getting my needs, wants and desires fulfilled too. We introduced toys for me about 4 years ago or so and that is when our sex life finally turned a corner, and I learned I was a squirter. Things picked up for us and we began exploring more and more new positions to try and keep things fresh. Prior to joining ATW, I felt we were at our peak for our sex life. We blossomed late but better late than never. We enjoyed each other so much!

Signing up on ATW

So, you’re likely wondering what brought me here? Here’s the answer, I originally joined to try and help make a little extra money so I could feel I was contributing to our family financially. Due to the current economy and things just getting more and more expensive and raising two kids, money is almost always tight it seems. Being a SAHM (stay at home mom) is the hardest job I’ve ever had yet the most rewarding at the same time. It is cheaper for me to stay home and go without an income than be in the workforce and have to pay for childcare. So, after seeing some stories on Facebook about SAHM’s selling worn clothing items and feet pictures, I took a chance. I hit google and found ATW and PD and decided to give ATW a shot. My plan was to sell worn clothing, feet pictures and boob pictures and just see what happened. It wasn’t long before I realized there was soooooo much more to this site than worn clothes. I jumped in headfirst, and I never looked back. Reconnecting with my naughty side so to speak has been so much fun. My time here has been nothing short of incredible and I plan to be around for a long, long time.

ATW has become my outlet and escape from my vanilla home-life as a bible believing, church going wife and mother. It has brought so much joy, yes joy, and fun into my life! I have been absolutely BLOWN AWAY with my success and how well I’ve done thus far. By far, the most surprising thing to me has been how many young guys I’ve worked with. I’d say probably 90% of my clients are younger than this 39-year-old MILF.

ATW as a self-esteem booster

That leads me to my next point, being here, being as successful as I have been so far has not just helped but absolutely cured my self-confidence, self-esteem and self-worth issues that I have struggled with for over 25 years. Having men other than my husband want and desire my body has been eye-opening for me. Knowing I have clients who keep coming (cumming) back for more and more is absolutely incredible! I feel sexier, more confident and happier than I have in a very long time since becoming a seller.

Now for the really good stuff, when I first joined, I’d definitely say my husband and I had a pretty vanilla sex life. Albeit a good one, it was pretty plain jane. Being so active here has really opened up my sexy naughty side and made me crave the things I’ve always wanted in the bedroom even more. I had my naughty side suppressed for sooooo many years and it has been so incredible to open it back up and explore it with my husband. What I do here often leaves me very horny so that works in his favor as well. We have tried so many new things and I can definitely say our sex life isn’t plain jane or vanilla anymore! I’ve learned about new kinks and fetishes I have and have strengthened those I already knew about prior to joining. We may be late bloomers, but we are definitely at the height of our sex life right now and I’m so here for it! I’m so thankful he’s been so receptive.

One of my favorite things about being here is the fun I’ve been able to have with men all over the world. Getting men other than my husband to cum for me makes me so hot, horny and wet. I love knowing that what I’ve got is what it takes for you to blow a big load. Wears, custom videos, sexting and phone sex are some of my absolute favorites. I love chatting and charge nothing for it, nor do I believe in fees of any kind. Building a connection and having good banter is what I’m here for. Most of my clients are repeats and they always come back for more. I treat them with the utmost respect, am honest, real and spoil them. When I say I’m not like other sellers here, I truly mean it. You’ve got to experience me to find that out but any of my good boys can tell you that I am a damn Unicorn.

Conclusion

I am genuine and what you see is what you get from me. I am not fake in any way and do not use any filters on any of my images. I’m here for the fun and distraction that ATW provides me, and you’ll often find me running some incredible deals. I know some of the people I’ve connected with here will be lifelong friends and for that I’m eternally grateful. So, if you’re a new seller here and things are slow, don’t get discouraged. Put in the effort and the work and be real and it will pay off. And if you have questions or need advice, I’m just a click away. And to you buyers, remember we are ALL people on the other end of a screen. Be kind, respectful and courteous to those you chose to work with and I’m sure they’ll treat you even better. We are not pieces of meat and most of us have very busy lives outside of ATW. Drop those messages, make those connections, get each other off and have FUN!

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